Category: Life

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Surviving Life 101

In any situation in life, there are at least 2 ways to respond: the POSITIVE/CONSTRUCTIVE way and the NEGATIVE/DESTRUCTIVE way.

I have been pondering this as I try to guide my children through what they encounter as challenges in life.

For example, M1 is so unlike his brother M2. When something happens in school that is not pleasant, M1 reacts by becoming moody; M2, on the other hand, comes to me with a broad impish grin and tells me, “Guess what, Mom! I got my first GREEN SLIP!” (notice from school that he had several minor slip-ups) and walks away as though nothing happened.

It tells me that M1 is a more sensitive child. He is actually the more compassionate child in the family and would readily help out where help is needed. He is also the one who never fails to play with our dogs as soon as he comes home. But being more sensitive than others, his peers’ opinion of him means the world to him and he easily feels down when things do not go “right” in his perception.

Teaching our children how to survive the travails of life is not easy. But somehow, we have to try so that when hard times come, they will know how to cope and survive. I have had my share of survivals. Continue reading “Surviving Life 101”

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…In Sickness and In Health…

As I write this post, I still do not know what will become of Raul, our dear friend in the States, who has been in a coma, brain dead, and fighting for dear life. A month after their family arrived in the States, happy to have Cynthia (Raul’s wife) start her new work assignment there, Raul had a major stroke (his second one — the first being here in the Philippines years ago).

Cynthia has managed to work, take care of their 2 sons, and still have to deal with day-to-day decisions and the up-and-down stressful events with Raul’s situation improving one day and deteriorating the next. But a few days ago, in an online chat, Cynthia told me that Raul’s recovery was nil and that their family had surrendered him to the Lord and had decided not to use artificial means to prolong his life. Continue reading “…In Sickness and In Health…”

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All Shall Be Well

When I feel down and out, this is a song that consoles me. All Shall Be Well is one of the songs from the album of Bukas Palad “Let Your Praises Be Heard”. What makes it extra special though is that its lyrics were done by Fr. Johnny C. Go, SJ and Fr. Manoling Francisco, SJ. Fr. Johnny is our boys’ School Director; Fr. Manoling is the brother of a former colleague at work.

Just recently, I had a chance encounter with this song again. It’s funny since I had totally forgotten about it until just a few weeks ago when a blogger friend of mine, Cathy, did a post about it. Cathy had lost her son Migi in 1998 due to complications from open heart surgery. In his memory, she founded Migi’s Corner, a place for children, in government hospitals. To-date there are 13 such Migi’s Corners nationwide. Cathy recounts how a former Theology teacher of hers, now based in Norway, sent her The Migi’s Corner video with “All Shall Be Well” as the theme song. And even more surprising, she discovered that the singer in the video was her good friend, Bukas Palad singer Laine. The video came at the right time as she was about to celebrate another anniversary of Migi’s passing. It’s amazing how the Lord brings together people and events at just the right time!

The timing of everything was not lost on me. Currently, friends of ours in the States are in crisis. They had just recently moved there since the wife was to take up her new job. The husband, who already had a stroke in the Philippines, again had a stroke there, rendering him in coma and totally paralyzed. Without anything else to comfort her with, I remembered Cathy’s post and promptly sent the wife the YouTube version of this song.

And…as I wait for the Lord’s healing on me as I deal with painful bouts due to kidney stones, I turn back to this song to get reminded that He is always in control and…

All Shall Be Well.

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Perspectives of Suffering

Over the weekend, I was confined for severe pain arising from kidney stones. The pain was almost unbearable. I was writhing in pain at the hospital and no matter what position I was on the gurney at the ER, the pain remained. It was not something I would wish on my worst enemy.

Through the pain spasms though, I suddenly thought of my sister-in-law who passed away of breast cancer. On her last summer in this world, we had the privilege of being with her in the province. I personally had the chance to serve her in some way by taking turns caring for her every basic need during those weeks. And during the times she would suffer, we constantly talked to her about turning her suffering into use by offering it up for someone. That way, suffering did not end up useless but instead, gets transformed into a powerful tool for intercession.

Then my mind wandered to friends in the States. The wife was recently sent there on a work assignment by her company and was allowed to bring her whole family. Her husband had a stroke a few years back, paralyzing his entire left side. But over the years of therapy, he recovered enough to be mobile. A month into their arrival in the States, he again had a major stroke, this time paralyzing his right side. As of this posting, he is still in coma with no clear or positive signs of recovery. The wife, though devastated, has tried to cling to whatever faith and strength is within her.

So as I lay in the Emergency Room of the hospital, and as wave after wave of pain went through my body and groggy as I was from painkillers, I somehow managed to maintain one thought. I asked the Lord to use that pain to shower graces on my friends.

Looking at one’s suffering exclusively makes one wallow in self-pity. It is only when one sees it from the perspective of others’ sufferings that one’s own situation appears trivial or miniscule.

One more life lesson for me.

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Life’s Wonderful Surprises and Simple Pleasures

A friend sent this via text today:

Sometimes we put too much passion on the biggest dreams & priorities in life

That we fail to love the smallest pleasures from simple things.

We search so much for the right choices, for the right paths to walk through,

For the right time & for the right reasons.

But life isn’t about searching for the things that can be found.

It is about letting the unexpected happen and

Finding things you never searched for.

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Growing Old Gracefully

It is a divine blessing to have your parents reach the 90s. Even more when both of them are still strong and healthy!

My father-in-law is 92, going 93. And he walks without a cane, does some form of T’ai Chi every morning, shows mostly normal results in his blood chemistry tests, and can remember to send bday cards to everyone in the family, down to the youngest grandchild.

My mother-in-law just turned 90 as well and she can exchange witty repartee with you. She uses a walker due to a bad fall some years back but otherwise, her physical and mental state are very good.

It makes me wonder how one can somehow influence Mother Nature and have a greater chance of reaching such ripe, old ages. Off the top of my head, I can think of a few possibilities:

1. NO MANILA POLLUTION!!!!

2. Eating lots of organically grown fruits and vegetables, less meat, more fish

3. Daily exercise

4. Stress-free lifestyle

5. Good genes (unfortunately, this one is God-given and beyond our control)

But I guess when one is surrounded by the people you love and who love you back, this becomes an even more important factor in wanting to live longer.

We celebrated my parents-in law’s 50th Wedding Anniversary 9 years ago. How many couples can lay claim to having reached this milestone in their married lives? Next December (2007), God willing, they will still both be around to see their 60th anniversary celebrated. That will truly be another joyous event that will bring together everyone they touched during their life as a couple.

It is wonderful to grow old GRACEFULLY, to grow old TOGETHER, to watch your family grow, to see your children in your grandchildren’s faces….