Life Archives - Page 5 of 14

February 25, 2009

A Tragic Accident in Ateneo

I was not about to blog about this as I still have a heavy heart. But I realize that LIFE has its happy and sad moments and both, combined, make up our human-ness.

My girls, who study in Ateneo, gave me a heads-up last night on the tragic car accident that claimed the life of a Gr. 4 10-year old boy inside the school grounds. His name was Julian Carlo Miguel (Amiel) Alcantara.

My friend Cathy has most of the details in her blog. As details unfold, it appears Amiel and his yaya stepped out of their car to get some food in the school canteen. Meanwhile, a 30-ish Mom in her van had taken over the driver’s seat while her driver went to get her son. Amiel and yaya were going back to their car when the Mom moved the van. Accounts differ as to whether the van was in front, behind or alongside Amiel. But it looks like the mom stepped on the gas instead of the brakes. Amiel is crushed between two cars and has to be retrieved, bloodied, from underneath. He does not survive. Amiel’s 7th grade older brother was in the car, witness to it all.

Tragic. Depressing. A huge loss for the Alcantara family that no words can describe. A horrific nightmare for the Mom involved.

No one wished for this to happen. I grieved for Amiel last night and shed some tears while reading news that came in trickles. No child would ever imagine that they could be anything but safe inside their school. I grieved too for the young Mom. She has to live with this thought for the rest of her life. I cannot imagine what must be going through her head today.

The incident was another awakening to the shortness of life and how it can be snuffed out of our loved ones any day, any time. I was imagining that if it could happen in Ateneo, it could very well happen in my boys’ school or any school for that matter. They walk to and from school daily, cross streets, and have to contend with the traffic that comes through our street since we live close to 2 schools. My girls in Ateneo also cross Katipunan almost daily to eat at restaurants there. They are just as vulnerable to vehicular accidents and it is only by the grace and protection of God that I see them come home safely each day.

I still believe that nothing happens by accident but in a situation like this, I cannot help but ponder what was the purpose of the whole situation. All I can do is trust that Amiel’s death HAD a purpose and he did not die in vain. But for now, as a mother, I grieve with both families. I pray that as today, Ash Wednesday, starts the Lenten Season, that they both somehow find our God’s comforting Love and Peace.

And for those of us who have children who leave our homes each day for school or work, say a prayer of protection over them every night as you put them to bed, embrace them tightly, and tell them how much you love them. Don’t wait for another tomorrow. Tomorrow may not be there…

For those interested in wake details for Amiel, I am reposting this from Wawam:

His body lies in state at the Chapel of the Holy Guardian Angels, Ateneo de Manila Grade School.

Wake masses will be held at 7:30 PM from Wednesday, February 25, 2009 to Friday, February 27, 2009.

The remains of Amiel will be cremated at the Arlington Crematorium, Araneta Avenue, Quezon City at 2:00 PM on Saturday, February 28, 2009. There will be a mass at 11:00 AM at the AGS Chapel before the body is brought to Arlington for cremation.

February 20, 2009

‘Heaven’s Butterfly’: A Friend’s Book on Helping Children Deal with Grief

Last Feb. 17, 2009 (Tuesday), I purposely went to Ateneo to finally meet (in person) a special online friend who was launching a book she and her daughter collaborated on. “Heaven’s Butterfly” was launched by Cathy Babao-Guballa and daughter P under the umbrella of Anvil Publishing — a Philippine first — a children’s book on how to cope with grief.

Just a little background story on how Cathy and I became friends without ever meeting up.

Our common thread was our friend Noemi Dado. I found out that Noemi and Cathy were involved in a grief support group called Griefshare. I can’t remember exactly when I first contacted Cathy but I started to email her and she responded. We discovered common things. I met her late father way back when he was with the Phinma Group and I was a junior auditor assigned to his company. We discovered common friends, common interests (writing, health and wellness) and were co-parents in our boys’ school at one time. When I was hospitalized due to kidney stones in 2007, Cathy (without even knowing me that well), sent me a wonderful, HUGE health book which I continue to use as a reference. We hooked up via email and would chat whenever we saw each other online. There had been occasions when we would plan to finally meet but our schedules somehow never jelled. Till now.

In her blog, Cathy writes about the inspiration behind Heaven’s Butterfly:

“The book talks about the story of our life in the first year after Migi died. It specifically describes P’s journey from a place of sadness to a place of hope….“Heaven’s Butterfly” was a difficult story to write in the sense that we had to dig up and unearth many emotions from years ago. It is never easy to dredge up the past, more so if the memories are painful. However, it was also liberating because in doing so, we were remembering Migi and all the wonderful memories we had of him during those four, beautiful years that he was lent to us. By sharing part of our journey, we hope to be able to reach out to many more children who have lost loved ones – be it a parent, a friend, a grandparent, or a sibling — all pain is the same. Whenever we lose someone we love, we are forever changed by the experience.

We hope that parents and teachers who read this book will come to realize that grief and loss, when it takes place, cannot just be swept under the rug. Losing someone is a real occurrence in a child’s world and we must allow that child to grieve. As adults and caregivers, we must do everything in our power to help them navigate that journey from sadness to hope.”

P, Cathy and me (the online friends finally meet up)

The launch was held at Ateneo’s Dela Costa Hall since Cathy teaches in Ateneo. P is also an incoming freshman and a budding doctor-in-the-making. Heaven’s Butterfly was wonderfully illustrated also by Atenean artist/illustrator, Frances C. Alcaraz.

It was a very close, intimate affair with family and friends of Cathy, P and Panch in attendance. I even got to meet Cathy’s mom, someone I admired from afar for a very long time — not only as a versatile actress but as a woman who handled her own grief with grace and lives life to the fullest up to now. I was indeed blessed to have the chance to sit down and chat with Caridad Sanchez and her equally vibrant friend, Chit Almario.

The effervescent friends: Chit Almario & Caridad Sanchez

“Heaven’s Butterfly” will be available at Powerbooks and National Bookstore starting February 23, 2009.

February 15, 2009

Spa + Theater = BlueWater Day Spa Theater!!!

I have tried several spas. Some were disappointing; others were great experiences that wanted me yearning to go back.

I am a yogini so spas are a welcome winding-down treat after a really great, sweaty yoga class. Many times, the aches and pains I feel are immediately relieved by a great massage. I am an advocate for healthy living and I truly believe that the spas contribute significantly to overall wellness.

As a part-time consultant too, I am not immune to the stress that corporate life brings and last year, I did find myself more often at a spa either for hand/foot treatments or a rub-down just so I could tune out my stress and breathe it out.

But guess what! BlueWater Day Spa has cooked up a winning combination for a spa. This concept is unlike any of the other BlueWater Day Spas you see around the metro. In fact, my office building had a BlueWater Day Spa branch right behind that I patronized. THIS one, definitely a first in the Metro, is a SPA THEATER!

bluewater-day-spa-theater

BlueWater Day Spa Theater is a haven in the heart of the corporate jungle and is located along Ortigas Avenue.

Its look and amenities are unlike any others. Check out these features:

* 621 sq, meters – larger than the usual branch sizes

* A larger reception area with a Modern European look

* A private consultation area so you can be assisted in choosing the right treatment for you

* A theater that can accommodate 28 people at a time and features High Definition cinema projectors with Dolby Sorround 7.1 sounds and BluRay movies

* The 28 Lazy Boy leather-seat sofas have been tailored to lean back at an angle suitable for both movie watching and comfort while being pampered

bluewater-hallway — this awesome hallway makes you feel like floating on water

Read more about the theater’s features and see more photos HERE.

Of course, they still have the usual private and common rooms if you prefer their individual treatments.

I thought that one unique concept for a spa party at BlueWater Day Spa Theater would be a baby shower-spa party.

I have 4 kids and while they are all in their teens and tweens now, I can still clearly remember what it was like to be pregnant. You felt bloated all the time. Your feet hurt easily and you were in this constant state of fatigue and dizziness. Your tummy was too big for you to see your toes — worse, to even give yourself a decent pedicure. You also felt ugly at times because your officemates were all dressed in their corporate attire while you had to wear flats with a shapeless dress.

So, for the mother-to-be, holding her baby shower in the spa theater would be a chance for her to literally put her feet up, be treated to a great spa treatment while relaxing on a reclining sofa, and made to feel beautiful all over. It would be a treat too for her married friends whose husbands can likewise settle down to a good movie. And for her single female/male friends? Of course, this would be a treat they won’t say no to! The lolos and lolas-to-be would greatly enjoy this treat as well. The movies could either be the mother-to-be’s family videos or wholesome family movies that can keep everyone entertained, relaxed and truly at home. Gift opening would be even more fun since the baby shower celebrant could be videotaped opening her gifts and this could be projected onto the huge theater screen, including clips of the proud daddy-to-be.

I really would love to try this spa theater out. My home is not far away too so that is a PLUS!

Well, I may no longer be a potential baby shower mommy but I can think of so many excuses reasons to visit BlueWater Day Spa Theater again and again.

January 12, 2009

Benjamin Button Quotes I Love

Today, two friends and I watched The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.

No, it was not the fact that Brad Pitt was in the movie that got me there. It was because I knew this was another one of those movies filled with life lessons.

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button is about a man who is born in his eighties and over time, grows younger. The story begins in New Orleans at the end of World War I in 1918 and ends in the 21st century. His life is filled with people he meets, places he discovers, the loves he experienced, the many joys of life, and the sadness of losing people he loved. He also discovered what would last beyond a single lifetime.

The almost 3-hour movie dragged a bit in some places, especially the ones that showed him still aged. But Lynn pointed me to this site that listed some of the quotes that I totally related to:

Benjamin: I was thinking how nothing lasts, and what a shame that is.

Daisy: Some things last.

(my thought bubble: LOVE lasts…)

Along the way you bump into people who make a dent on your life. Some people get struck by lightning. Some are born to sit by a river. Some have an ear for music. Some are artists. Some swim the English Channel. Some know buttons. Some know Shakespeare. Some are mothers. And some people can dance.

(my thought bubble: I’m the mom and the girl who dances!)

We’re meant to lose the people we love. How else are we supposed to know how important they are?

(my thought bubble: Do we need to wait to lose people we love to arrive at this realization? I wish people realized BEFORE loved ones die!)

Your life is defined by its opportunities… even the ones you miss.

(my thought bubble: Oh so true!!!)

I wanna remember us just as we are now.

(my thought bubble: I do exactly what Benjamin does — make a memory imprint whenever I want to remember a person or savor a moment…)

Sometimes we’re on a collision course, and we just don’t know it. Whether it’s by accident or by design, there’s not a thing we can do about it.

(my thought bubble: This has been the story of my life for about 2 years now and this was what I had just blogged about!!!)

You can be mad as a mad dog at the way things went; you can swear and curse the fates – but when it comes to the end, you have to let go.

(my thought bubble: Letting go is really the only way to forgive, move on, and be at peace…)

For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.

(my thought bubble: This is what I wish for my own life and for everyone…)

If you still have not seen it, I would recommend you going with your spouse, special someone or close friend/s. Somehow, the impact of such a movie is stronger when the people you love watch with you.

January 11, 2009

Beautiful Yoga Quotes – updated

This post originally came out in my yoga blog, The Yogini from Manila. But I felt that these also spoke strongly about how we deal with life so I am posting these here, with a few more additions.

I hope some of these will touch you just as they touch me…..

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Yoga teaches us to cure what need not be endured and endure what cannot be cured. ~B.K.S. Iyengar

You cannot do yoga. Yoga is your natural state. What you can do are yoga exercises, which may reveal to you where you are resisting your natural state. ~Sharon Gannon

Yoga is possible for anybody who really wants it. Yoga is universal…. But don’t approach yoga with a business mind looking for worldly gain. ~Sri Krishna Pattabhi Jois

By embracing your mother wound as your yoga, you transform what has been a hindrance in your life into a teacher of the heart. ~Phillip Moffitt

Yoga is 99% practice and 1% knowledge. ~Sri Krishna Pattabhi Jois

Anyone who practices can obtain success in yoga but not one who is lazy. Constant practice alone is the secret of success. ~Svatmarama, Hatha Yoga Pradipika

Yoga is the practice of quieting the mind. ~Patanjali, translated from Sanskrit

When you inhale, you are taking the strength from God. When you exhale, it represents the service you are giving to the world. ~B.K.S. Iyengar

Inhale, and God approaches you. Hold the inhalation, and God remains with you. Exhale, and you approach God. Hold the exhalation, and surrender to God. ~Krishnamacharya

Yoga is difficult for the one whose mind is not subdued. ~Bhagavad Gita

In karma yoga no effort is ever lost, and there is no harm. Even a little practice of this discipline protects one from greater fear (of birth and death). ~ Bhagavad Gita

When the breath wanders the mind also is unsteady. But when the breath is calmed the mind too will be still, and the yogi achieves long life. Therefore, one should learn to control the breath. ~Svatmarama, Hatha Yoga Pradipika

For breath is life, and if you breathe well you will live long on earth. ~Sanskrit Proverb

When the winds of change blow, some people build walls and others build windmills. ~ Chinese Proverb

Undisturbed calmness of mind is attained by cultivating friendliness toward the happy, compassion for the unhappy, delight in the virtuous, and indifference toward the wicked. ~ The yoga sutras of Patanjali

Yoga exists in the world because everything is linked. ~ Desikashar

Before you’ve practiced, the theory is useless; After you’ve practiced, the theory is obvious. ~ David Williams, Ashtanga teacher

Yoga is the perfect opportunity to be curious about who you are. ~ Jason Crandell

Yoga is invigoration in relaxation. Freedom in routine. Confidence through self control. Energy within and energy without. ~ Ymber Delecto

The most important pieces of equipment you need for doing yoga are your body and your mind. ~ Rodney Yee

Yoga heals, nourishes, and challenges us. The practice infiltrates every corner of our lives. ~ Valerie Jeremijenko

Yoga is difficult for the one whose mind is not subdued. ~ Bhagavad Gita

Yoga is about clearing away whatever is in us that prevents our living in the most full and whole way. With yoga, we become aware of how and where we are restricted — in body, mind, and heart — and how gradually to open and release these blockages. As these blockages are cleared, our energy is freed. We start to feel more harmonious, more at one with ourselves. Our lives begin to flow — or we begin to flow more in our lives. ~ Cybele Tomlinson

Yoga does not remove us from the reality or responsibilities of everyday life but rather places our feet firmly and resolutely in the practical ground of experience. We don’t transcend our lives; we return to the life we left behind in the hopes of something better. ~ Donna Farhi

Namaste.

January 6, 2009

Of Second Chances, Destiny and a Free Book on Life’s Meaning

“Nothing happens by chance” – from Kung Fu Panda

*****

Tomorrow, January 7, I celebrate a major event in my life — the anniversary of the night when I almost lost my life and gained another chance to live.

That life-changing, tumultuous event showed me a strength of character and spirit I did not think I had, transformed my outlook into one that now seeks constant meaning and mission, and brought into my life a slew of friends who will be some of my truest friends in this lifetime.

I will always look back on this day as God’s divine blessing and protection over me.

*****

The past 2 years have been a journey of discovery and destiny. Two dear friends are walking with me through life in a most wonderful way. It is amazing how connected our lives are! There are days when I just sit and ponder how we have led parallel lives years ago and yet, our lives were not meant to be perfect parallels (beside each other but never meeting). Instead we led lives that were hurtling towards each other and 2007-2008 were the years when these points intersected. It has been interesting times — to say the least. Thank you, J and C. Your presence in my life and in the years to come will always have the imprint of God’s design on them. We may not always comprehend, but we KNOW we are meant to be here, at this time of our lives, together.

*****

Another event cemented my growing belief that nothing happens by accident.

2009 begins with my life in a state of flux. My project just ended in December and there is nothing in the horizon for now in terms of another project coming my way soon. It is not a worrisome situation yet and actually is a relief for me as I want to get back to yoga while trying to deal with what to do next with my life.

After I posted my previous blog entry, I got a comment from Louise Lewis, author of the book “No Experts Needed: The Meaning of Life According to You”.

louise-lewis

no-experts-needed-book

It is not every day that a book author chances upon, and comments on, my blog so I curiously followed the link to her website and eventually to Amazon.com and iUniverse (her publisher). Oh my! Her book reviews averaged 4.5 stars out of 5!!!

She had offered to give out her book for free. I submitted my email address and the site said they would be sending me a chapter of the book. However, when the actual email came in, I was very surprised to find that it was a REAL offer to give away her book for free — I did not just just get one chapter, I got the ENTIRE book in PDF format (all 232 pages!).

This stumped me. Why would someone sell the book on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Booksense and iUniverse and still give it away for free!

Still curious, I emailed Louise to thank her for sending her book and she answered back. We have had several email exchanges over the last 24 hours and amazingly, I find a certain connection to her. The timing of this communication, coming on the heels of the project just concluded with a still uncertain future, is not lost on me. There IS a purpose and reason to our paths crossing!

Here is part of one email she sent me that explains the rationale behind her free book:

Hi Jane!

Thank you for contacting me…it means the world to me!

It is indeed my pleasure to share my book with you.

At one point, a free chapter was all that I gave away. But recently, words from Spirit reminded me I am far more generous than that. So, I’m now giving away my entire book.

“Louise, why on earth are you giving away your book?”

That’s a great question…but the answer is even greater (to me!)

Let me explain…

Some time back, I read the story about bestselling author Paulo Coelho (The Alchemist). Years ago he put his little-known book online for free after he was dropped by his publisher for poor sales. With no additional promotion, word of his book spread, and after a few years, sales grew to a million copies of multiple titles.

“Hmm,” I said. “Selling books would sure be nice, but the idea of giving away my book really does feel like the right thing to do, but…” Spirit quickly chimed in: “YES! That’s who you are! Do it!”

Being the hard-head that I am, I ignored Spirit and walked away from the idea. …But Spirit wasn’t giving up so quickly…

Then a few days after that, Suze Orman (famous financial advisor) announced on Oprah that she was giving away her new book, Women & Money, on Oprah’s website. She said her passion for helping women control their finances was her reason.

Again, I heard from Spirit, a bit more forcefully this time, “That’s who you are! You have that kind of passion! You wrote this book to share your story with the world. So do it! Share it!”

I finally “got it”…

This will all make much more sense when you read my book. You’ll learn that years ago I made a promise to myself to always follow the messages I receive from Spirit (not Ego.) And from doing so, I’m here to tell you that my amazing journey continues today.

Do you want to have a FREE copy of Louise’s book? Click HERE and fill out your email address. The PDF file will be sent to you in its entirety. Louise is eager for feedback from you after you’ve read her book. And, at least for now, I assure you that she PERSONALLY answers each email!